Pain Isn’t a Personality Trait 🧩
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." — Carl Jung
I used to think certain people just brought out the worst in me.
That they were the problem.
That if I could just avoid them, or control them, I’d be okay.
But the truth…
They were mirrors.
Uncomfortable ones.
They didn’t create my pain.
They revealed it.
"Your triggers are your responsibility. Your healing isn’t optional."
It’s easier to say “you made me feel this way.”
Harder to ask, “Why does this hit so deep?”
One day, someone ghosted me. And I spiraled. Not because they owed me anything…
But because the wound wasn’t about them.
It was about abandonment.
It was about childhood.
It was about never feeling safe to be forgotten.
That’s when I realized:
Healing isn’t about getting life to stop triggering you.
It’s about understanding why it does and choosing not to bleed on the people who didn’t cause the cut.
These small notes arrive quietly,
like morning light through a cracked window.
No noise. Just truth.
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Here’s your journal prompt:
“What’s one thing I keep blaming others for that I haven’t yet taken ownership of?”
Then ask:
What’s underneath that?
And what would healing it actually require?
Write it down.
Truth only.
No justifications. Just clarity.
Blame may soothe your pride.
But it won’t heal your nervous system.
Only radical ownership will do that.
So if you’re tired of being hijacked by the same emotions,
Over and over again…
Maybe it’s time to stop fighting the mirror
And start looking into it.
You’re not broken.
You’re just overdue for honesty.
Have you ever traced a trigger back to something deeper?
Something unexpected?
Or had a moment where you realized you were reacting to a memory, not the present?
Share it. Let’s normalize the mess of becoming conscious.
No shame. Just honesty.
If you’re here, you’re part of something real, something that holds space for healing without the need to perform. I don’t take that lightly.
If this space feels like home.
If it holds your ache, your becoming, your breath.
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However you choose to support, whether by sharing, buying a coffee, or simply showing up… thank you. Truly.
If you think these gentle words cut deep, wait until you read Shadow Thoughts. That’s where I let the truth bleed without cleaning it up for anyone.
