Playing Small Isn't Noble 🎭

"Your silence will not protect you." — Audre Lorde

Let me tell you something hard-earned:
There was a stretch of my life where I didn't speak up. Not at work, not in relationships, not even with myself. I had convinced myself that staying quiet was wise. That humility meant shrinking.

“Who benefits most from the version of you that's playing small?”

But that wasn't humility.
It was fear, with a halo.

I wasn’t being kind. I was being manageable. Palatable. Predictable. And the more I performed that version of myself, the more the world rewarded it.

Easy to love. Easy to overlook. Easy to control.

The people who benefited from my smallness weren’t the ones who truly loved me. They were the ones who feared what might happen if I fully showed up.

These small notes arrive quietly,
like morning light through a cracked window.
No noise. Just truth.
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Your inner work.

Try this journal prompt:
What part of you have you shrunk to protect someone else's comfort?

Now ask yourself, was it worth the cost?

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Just because they’re benefiting… Doesn’t mean you’re thriving.

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All in all.

There’s nothing virtuous about disappearing inside your own life.

The world doesn’t need a muted version of you.

It needs the version that speaks the uncomfortable truths, claims the space you’ve earned, and honors the soul that never asked to shrink.

You're allowed to be big.
Loud. Clear. True.

So stop pretending the cage is a choice.
Walk out.

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Let’s talk about it.

Have you ever caught yourself pretending to be “low-maintenance” when really, you just didn’t want to be abandoned?

Ever stayed small because you feared what your bigness might disrupt?

Tell us the moment you realized playing small was a lie your ego told you to stay safe.

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Thanks for reading today’s Healing Text.

If you’re here, you’re part of something honest, something that makes space for healing without the performance. And I don’t take that lightly.

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And if you’re craving deeper reflections, long-form stories, raw journal entries, and shadow work tales that cut through the noise, I write those in my other newsletter…

Whether you support with a share, a coffee, or just by showing up… thank you.

With gratitude,
— Ryan Puusaari ☕💛

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