Say Less, Mean More 🧭
"He who angers you conquers you." — Elizabeth Kenny
“In your next disagreement, pause before responding. Take three deep breaths and consider how your words can clarify rather than escalate.”
Have you ever noticed how fast things unravel during conflict?
It can take less than five seconds. One eyebrow raise. One poorly timed sigh. A tone slightly too sharp. And suddenly, what could have been a conversation becomes a courtroom.
Think about film scenes like A Few Good Men or even Marriage Story. The turning point is rarely the content, it’s the reaction. The pacing of speech, the rising pitch, the immediate rebuttal.
This isn’t just theatrics. It’s biology.
When we feel attacked, our brain reroutes resources away from logic and straight into defense. The prefrontal cortex, the part responsible for reasoned thought, gets sidelined. The body surges with adrenaline. Pulse climbs. Breath shortens.
You’re no longer communicating. You’re bracing for impact.
But a simple pause, three conscious breaths, reboots the entire system.
It takes you out of survival mode. It buys back clarity.
And sometimes, that’s all you need to stop pouring gasoline on a fire that never needed to be lit in the first place.
Next time your heart rate jumps mid-conversation, pause.
Literally.
Close your mouth. Inhale for four. Hold for four. Exhale for six. Do it three times.
It will feel strange. Maybe even forced.
But it stops your reaction from being hijacked by instinct.
Then ask yourself one question:
“Will what I say next lead to more light… or more heat?”
Choose accordingly.
"He who angers you conquers you." — Elizabeth Kenny
Reacting without thinking is handing over the steering wheel of your character to someone else. Keep your grip.
Have you ever said something in the heat of the moment that made things worse? Or maybe you paused and watched everything shift?
Share it.
Your moment of restraint (or regret) might be the lesson someone else needs to hear today.
Control in conflict isn’t about dominance.
It’s about direction.
And you are not a slave to the moment. You are a steward of it.
So pause. Breathe. Decide who you want to be, before you speak.
Because words build or break. You get to choose which.
— Ryan Puusaari
Thank you for reading today’s Healing Text.
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